Marriage, Part 4: An Open Letter To Steven and Katie

Dear Steven and Katie,

If you are reading this, you are undoubtedly aware of my deep sadness and profound alarm regarding the news of your upcoming marriage. I have made my points in this blog over the last week or so, and only after much prayer and many tears. I will not review my fears now.

I only want to tell you both that I am your sister in Christ Jesus, and I don’t need to know you, or approve of your decisions or your lives, to love you as part of his Body. Indeed, it’s sincere concern for the two of you that motivates not only this but my previous posts. Steven, I have been praying for your healing and your safety since news of your offenses became public. I don’t hate you; on the contrary, I grieve for the wellspring of pain you’ve not only inflicted, but that you’ve suffered. I would protect you from harm if it were in my power to do so, and if you can hear past what your elders and your pastors have to say about me, you’ll know that I mean every word I say. If you’ve trusted in Christ for your salvation and forgiveness from sins, then you and I have that in common, and I count you as my brother. I truly want what’s best for you, and I very much doubt this is it.

Katie, you undoubtedly think that I’m trying to wrest away from you the happiness you’ve so desperately sought, and I can only imagine how awful you must think I am for involving myself in your plans. I understand that. But you are precious, just as Katie, to your Savior and mine, and so you are precious to me. I’m a stranger to you, but I was once a young woman trying to find my way. Some 30 years ago, I found that Way in Christ, and in September it will be 27 years that my husband and I have been married. Ours is a good thing — a holy thing, a wonderful thing, a blessed thing. But it is not “the thing” that made me whole. I want wholeness and happiness for you, and I suspect that Christ has a husband in mind for you; most of us do, in fact, get married. However, engagement after two dates to a man who is an acknowledged pedophile is not only unwise, but dangerous. The God we serve isn’t leading you to this, no matter what elders who presume to act in his name say.

I pray that your marriage doesn’t go through on June 11, and that may make me despicable in your eyes. Please, though, consider what I’m saying — all of it — instead of simply disregarding words that strike you as mean-spirited and ugly. Katie, I would love to talk with you, and you or Steven can email me at kjajmix1@msn.com, or call me at 336-4841. I promise you that any contact we have will be held in the strictest confidence, and I pray that your hearts will be touched by the wisdom of God’s Holy Spirit and comforted by the peace that passes all understanding. I want only to help you find that peace, because I love you both.

Keely Emerine-Mix.

Leave a Reply